Posts Tagged ‘monkey’

My Anthro professor has a thing for kittens. Every lecture, there’s at least 3 slides with cats in them, one being from the I can haz cheezburger empire. One of his TAs was kind enough to let us in on a secret:

Cute is a hormone.

Oxytocin to be exact. Apparently, when we see something cute the brain releases this feel good hormone. Let me demonstrate:

Feel the oxytocin, baby!

But oxytocin is more than just cute. There’s also a huge surge of it when mom breastfeeds and when a woman orgasms: both activities prompting women to form a deep bond with their infant or partner.

And you know what the secret of happy relationships is? Yep, Oxytocin.

According to a research done in the University of Wisconsin-Madison, monkeys in long standing relationships have high levels of oxytocin. Ladies and gentlemen, these monkeys are lucky, happy monkeys.

With more oxytocin, monkeys groom each other more, fuck more, and yes ladies, cuddle more. And here is the best part:

There’s been other researches on this. Look it up, you know you want to, you desperate, lonely, stuck-in-an-unhappy-relationship you.

Do you know how awesome this sounds? It’s like a medical cure for lazy, clueless significant others! Imagine your boyfriend who rolls over right after you make love or the girlfriend who can’t leave you alone when you need some time to yourself. Then imagine jacking them up with oxytocin. Man, wouldn’t that be nice?

Btw, it’s my anniversary today so if you have a syringe filled with oxytocin or coke, please, shoot me up.